Monday, 30 July 2012

Review of the Review of raman eateries Tonkotsu and Ittenbari

We really recommend you read the Review here first > http://www.metro.co.uk/lifestyle/restaurants/906133-amen-for-the-ramen-eateries-tonkotsu-and-ittenbari



Oh Marina, Marina, Marina what on earth are you on about and where are you? You lose us in your captivating though confusing knowledge of Japanese noodle joints. You leave us open-mouthed and wondering quite how to disseminate everything we've just read (and we read it thrice too). Hang-on did we spell your name correctly? Oh good we did (got told off recently by the bloke with bad hair for spelling his name wrong - unforgivable we know but hey, these things happen).

OK, so we get that ramen is noodles and noodle otaku are nerds, your knickers got in a twist and you squealed when you heard Ramen had "hit the capital" but inhaling them? Do we sneak off to the loo and spread them on the cistern top and roll a tenner for this? We really really do wish you'd expand upon your hint at "dream-like encounter in peculiar, intimidating Golden Gai" and the neon "gulch" of the red-light Kabukicho district (sounds rather reminiscent of a scene from that old film, Emmanuel).

We're not sure if we're still in the capital or somewhere rather more eastern but we follow you lamb-like into the "shonky, upstairs joint". Thankfully you don't then treat us to an architectural description of and from what the sodding bar is made but instead treat us to mind blowing descriptions of tiny savoury sardines, thin skinned dumplings, juicy pork and prawn ... trashy de-boned chicken thighs ...

Not wishing to detract a single minutest, tiniest ink dot from your gorgeous, ejaculation bringing descriptions of the food you encountered - we like this review ... except ... all three times we read it - we were and still are not sure which country we were in or even which bloody continent we were on for most of the time.

Oh Marina we could listen to you slurp your noodles all day long. Tell us of your experiences Golden Gai ... our elbows are on the table and our chin is resting in our hands ... go on, one last slurp just for us. Whisper in our ear - where are we?

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